Sorry about the late post. I wrote this last night, as my Sunday resulted in today’s topic.
Yesterday (Sunday) I was talking to a friend about why she gave up her favourite sport.
She was ridiculously good at it and had the potential to go very far in the sport, but most importantly, she thoroughly enjoyed it.
When she told me why she stopped all of a sudden, I was shocked but I could relate. I think many of us can.
Her dad told her that it would be very unlikely to be able to make a career out of her sport or ever compete in the Olympics. I assume this was to protect her from feeling disappointed and hurt if she never reached her goal.
Every time she would say her dream out loud, she was told not to get her hopes up because thousands of people want the same dream; therefore her dream was “unrealistic”.
As a result of being constantly told her dream was unrealistic or that she wasn’t good enough, she started to believe it.
Every time she would think of her goal, she got into the habit of telling herself she wasn’t good enough and that she was stupid to even think of it.
Self hate began and in no time she quit the one thing she loved and formed an eating disorder and depression.
It doesn’t surprise me, but it will always amaze me how words can create such a powerful effect on people’s lives and wellbeing.
Negative words are always louder than positive words, and when coming from someone you love and respect, nothing could be louder.
Perhaps her dad believed he was doing the right thing by trying to protect her from rejection if she never reached her goal.
Forty+ years ago opportunities to fulfil your dreams weren’t impossible but they didn’t have the resources that we have today, so maybe he was saying what he was always told.
One thing he didn’t know was that by saying these comments and by not believing and encouraging her to fulfil her dreams, this caused her a great amount of damage.
After a lot of ground work and having to remove the negative people out of her life, she just started to take up the sport again.
I could not be more proud of her. She is such a strong person physically and mentally.
What I realised is that it is so damn important to never call any goal unrealistic.
We have so many resources these days to be able to do anything we desire if we are willing to put in the hard work and dedication.
Always encourage and support others’ dreams but most importantly believe in your own dreams.
A child or friend may change their mind on their dream job every week, and instead of rolling your eyes or saying it’s very unlikely to get that job, encourage them so they can be the best they can be.
Fight for what you want and who you want to become.
Be kind to yourself,